Torres casts doubts over Blues future

In a surprisingly candid interview with Guillem Balague, Torres has wasted little time in expressing his disappointment at missing out on a starting place in the Chelsea side that won the Champions League, going on to claim for much of his time in West London he has felt 'lost' and may even have 'given up' were it not for the support he has received from those close to him.

The greatest day in Chelsea's history saw them defy the odds once more in the Champions League in beating hosts Bayern Munich on penalties to claim what had become a Holy Grail for Blues owner Roman Abramovich.

Torres felt his improved form over the past month would earn him a starting spot but Roberto Di Matteo elected to go with Didier Drogba, who vindicated his manager's faith by scoring Chelsea's leveller before netting the winning penalty in the shoot-out after the two sides drew 1-1 after extra-time.

Torres did not get on the pitch at the Allianz Arena last night [Saturday] until Chelsea fell behind seven minutes from time.

The 28-year-old won the corner that saw Didier Drogba equalise and impressed in extra-time but he was not among those chosen to take a penalty in the 4-3 shootout win, which saw Drogba once again steal the limelight.

Torres added: "Before the game, I felt it was going to be one of my best moments and I came with great desire and ambition.

"But then I had to start on the bench. I felt huge disappointment when I saw the starting line up, maybe the biggest disappointment of my life.

"In the end, I was able to play a bit and help the team.

"Right now, I do feel it's all worth it but the truth is I've gone through some very bad moments."

The Chelsea squad enjoying a victory parade throughout the capital on Sunday but for Torres any delight over claiming Europe's premier trophy has been tempered somewhat by the fact he played only a minimal role.

Torres concedes he feels let down by how things have transpired at Chelsea since joining them in January 2011 for a record £50million fee and it is a situation he is determined to rectify as soon as possible.

Torres told Sky Sports' Balague on his website www.guillembalague.com: "It's contradictory because I feel like I'm at a peak moment in my career, with more desire and hunger than I've felt in a long time but I've had to spend the final on the bench. It was a huge disappointment when I saw the line-up, perhaps the biggest in my life.

"I thought I would play in this game and I couldn't imagine not doing so. But in the end I could participate and offer the team something. I'm really happy.

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"This season I have felt things that I never had before. I've felt like they treated me in a way that I didn't expect. Not in the way that was spoken of when they signed me. We've had a lot of talks and we'll talk about my future.

"I have been through the worst moments of my career during the season and I am not willing to relive those moments.

"There have been many ups and downs and many moments where I felt lost and I didn't know what to do and where to be.

"I want them to tell me what is going to happen in the future. Football has been fair on us, on me.

"Now I do feel like football is worth it but I've been through a difficult time. The worst in my career. I don't want that again. There's been many times when I've felt lost, I wasn't sure what to do. I felt like I didn't know where I belonged.

"I'm eternally grateful to my family who have been by my side and also for the support of the owners who have stuck by me. And especially to the fans, if it hadn't been for them this season I would have given up."

Although Chelsea have yet to indicate whether they will reward Di Matteo for guiding them to FA Cup and Champions League glory with a permanent deal, Torres seems in no mood to wait to learn of what he can expect from the club.

"I need the club to tell me what is going to happen and what sort of role I will have within the team, what my duties are, what the club expects of me," he concluded. And then judge whether it is worth it."

Prior to the penalty shoot-out Torres was seen to be in heated discussion with Di Matteo, who elected against using the Spaniard as one of his five designated takers.

Gary Cahill has since revealed he was next on the list were the shoot-out to go to sudden death, but it is Balague's understanding Torres was keen to step up and play his part.

Torres did not let his disappointment prevent him from joining in last night's [Saturday] ecstatic celebrations and was delighted to add the Champions League to his World Cup and European Championship titles in his first full season at Stamford Bridge.

"Destiny finally gave Chelsea something it denied them in Moscow," Torres said, referring to the Blues 2008 final defeat.

"People don't remember the runners-up. We had the luck champions have.

"This team, above all at the end of this season, has had those moments of a champion team.

"We had a star or an angel or whatever you want to call it that maybe they didn't have in Moscow.

"I feel football has been fair to me. The game is like that - many times when you feel at your best is when people count on you the least."